History alive

"...Vietnam menceroboh Kampuchea pada tahun 1978 dan menjatuhkan kerajaan Khmer Rouge..."
Buku Teks Sejarah Tingkatan 5.
This is a short line from a very short paragraph in the History text that I teach about the role of Malaysia in ASEAN and the ZOPFAN (Zone of peace, freedom and neutrality) concept.

As a teacher of History, I look for ways to make the subject interesting and alive. So choosing Cambodia as a holiday destination is quite natural for me as Chapter 3 Form Four History covers the agrarian government of Angkor with a few paragraphs on Angkor Wat. I was looking forward to visiting The Killing Fields and the Genocide Museum when I was in Phnom Penh. The Khmer Rouge was mentioned in the Form 5 text and I remembered Pol Pot from the news report when I was young.

I was warned that the visit the Killing Fields can be depressive and I need to be strong. I had been praying before the trip. I marched into the Tuol Sleng Museum of Genocide with my camera...all ready to take pictures home to show my students. The museum is a big school compound. The classrooms are converted into prisons, torture chambers....divided into small dark cells. Pictures after pictures of people who were tortured there. I chose not to enter many of the classrooms to see the exhibits because it was too overwhelming. I sat at a bench outside and cried as the reality of the horror the Cambodians went through in the 1970s crept into me. In my state of shock I did not take a single picture.

Next was the Killing Fields. I expect this to be worse. It was indeed. No guide needed as a very comprehensive recording is prepared and the visitors just need to carry the recorder around. With the voice talking into my ear, bringing to life the whole place and the possiblities of seeing teeth, bones floating in the water or in the dirt, I could almost picture the horrifying sight of torture and killing. Visitors moved around in hush awe....maybe shocked by the exposure of such gruesome happenings and also in respect of the dead that is all around.

Ponds, sunken grounds of mass grave were labelled and pointed out. I can't get the the Killing Tree out of my mind. It's a big tree where the soldiers just swing the babies and young kids to it and then throwing them into the dump next to it. It's awful....

Then the Magic Tree....I could almost hear the songs being played loudly and the screaming of the tortured people and the same time. It was a most humbling and traumatising experience.

A stupa is erected to house the skulls and some bones of those killed there. I had seen and heard enough to know what went in that place during those time. I didn't enter the stupa but sat under the tree outside and reflected on the sad state of the human race. Power and greed have made mad men out of the leaders and turned them into animals.  "To keep you is no benefit. To destroy you is no loss". This is the motto used to justify what they did. If my family had lived there that day, we would not have survived because we fall into the category of literate people...wearing spectacles and having soft hands.

I am so thankful to be alive where I am today. This visit just fills me with gratitude to God for all the things and goodness He has blessed me and my family. It is a reminder to me again of my role as a teacher in school....to teach my students to love and not hate. To pass on goodness and rub kindness to the students around me with the hope that they will remember to pass it on the the next and the next and the next generations.

End of high school

Yesterday 27.11.13 was the last paper for Lyn. That marked the end of high school for her. 11 years in the public education system and what do I see in her?

Six years in Chinese school. The first three years were a torture. She was used to be pampered in the kindergarten as she was one of the best students there. Coming to the primary school was a culture shock. The harsh way teachers treat the students. It was stressful preparing her for school after each weekends. 

Her senior years in the primary was better. She found her ability. She became bolder though still extremely quiet and shy. Fear of teachers kind of drove her into her shell deeper. But she had lots of opportunities to represent the school for public speaking and story telling both in English and BM. She also joined the choir which built her love for singing in a choir. 

When she joined me in the secondary school, she stayed away from all the extra curricular activities which I joined. She wanted to earn her credits on her own and not because she is my daughter. She rejected the nomination to be a probate prefect twice simply because she thinks she is not good enough and she was nominated because of me. 

She found her niche in the secondary school. It's quite amazing to see her juggling lots of extra activities after school. She would be in the march pass team, first as one of the members and later to train others to march. I hated marching as I have two left legs. So it amazes me to see her shouting commands and drilling other kids. Must be the father's king scouts gene. 

Then she would run off for choir practice. In no time she was leading the choir and had to drop other activities to focus on the choir. Despite her heavy commitment to the school choir she still managed to find time to join a variety of English writing competitions. For the past five years, I had been fetching her home from school at around 5pm every other day. She gets the thrill in activities and competing. 

Gone is the shy and quiet girl that entered school five years ago. She talks too much and talks like a bullet train. I worry the teachers would complain to me that she is not attentive in class. They never did but I know of a teacher who moved her place because she talked in his class. (I'm most grateful for his action). 

She always sits in the last corner in class. Many times when I happen to pass by I noticed she is folding origami. Still amazes me that the teachers never confiscated her papers. She says she's multi-tasking. 

She has grown as a normal teenager should. I'm thankful to God that she is just a normal teenager with all the rich experiences from school.....both good and bad. Not forgetting all the ups and downs as an MYFer. 

She has become a good sister to the brother. They spend lots of time talking and she bullies him endlessly. She thinks it's her right to order him around because she is the oldest.  When the brother has nightmare, he runs to the sister to sleep in her room. When he has a problem, he pours his heart out to her. 

She is open and affectionate to us parents now. She talks to us and is more understanding. How she has matured over the years. 

I will miss praying with her on the way to school. Having her company while driving to school though she is asleep most of the time. Waiting for her after school and getting upset because she will not hurry but take her own sweet time. Listening to her when she gets in the car and goes on a bullet train talk, jumping from one topic to another. I'm lost most of the time but I'll nod and nod. Of course she catches me and say, 'mum you're not listening to me!'

So....when I picked her up from school yesterday, her uniform was like this:

The end of another chapter and beginning of a new one. God watch, protect and guide her in this new chapter that she is starting. 

Multi seed walnut wholemeal bread

I have problem understanding my bread machine. It had been producing bread of irregular shapes. Recently Yee shared a recipe with me which is so delicious that I used it as the base to all my bread. After much experimenting finally my loaf of bread yesterday turned out almost perfect. 

7/8 cup milk

1 egg 

2 tbsp margarine 

2 cups HP flour

1 cup wholemeal flour

3/4 tsp salt

2 tbsp sugar

2.5 tsp yeast

2tsp poppy seed

2 tbsp sunflower sees

2 tsp flax seed

1/3 c walnut ( crushed lightly)

Bake at Basic...the loaf should look like the picture below. 

Totally nutty and wholesome. Every bite has a crunch in it. 

Half Broke Horses

It's the year end holiday. One important agenda on my holiday to do list is read books. Saw the review of this book : Half Broke Horse by Jeannette Walls and decided to read it. 

No regrets. Beautifully written biography of Lily Casey Smith, the writer's grandmother. It has humor, pain, reality....all in one. One tough woman who made it in life. Truly inspiring. 

One of the best moments for me is reading a good book without anyone disturbing me or having to worry of what to do next. The bliss of holiday when I can throw the stress of work life in the bin for a while. 

Karen Kingsbury

My favorite writer at the moment. She makes me cry, laugh....puts me in suspense. The best Christian romance writer so far. 

Karen Kingsbury

Novelist

Karen Kingsbury is an American Christian novelist. She was a sports writer for the Los Angeles Times and later wrote for the Los Angeles Daily News. Her first book, Missy's Murder, was based on a murder story that she covered in Los Angeles.Wikipedia

Born: June 8, 1963 (age 50), Fairfax, Virginia, United States

Movies: Like Dandelion Dust, Gideon's Gift, Every Woman's Dream

The Chance

2013

The Bridge

2012

Let Me Hold You Longer

2004

Loving

2012

Leaving

2011

Coming Home

2012

Redemption

2002

Fifteen Minutes

2013

music

Music has played an important role in the family. It's the factor that bonds the kids. They speak music language. Many a times there is music from the piano and cajon. Then there is the ukulele that goes all over the house....everyone strums on it except me. I'm the only unmusical person in the house.

Dan with the ukulele. 

Started with the guitar. 

The next instrument that is coming to the house is the saxaphone. We are waiting for a good time to visit the music shop, find a teacher to teach the instrument and get the instrument. I was very impressed by a band that performed in a wedding. The saxaphonist was good and I enjoyed it very much. So suggested to Dan to pick up that instrument too. We'll see. It will be our year end project.

slow blogging year

This has been a real slow blogging year for me. It's the mid of October....almost year end and I hardly have time to blog. The whole year has been so busy that I put on hold almost all the things that I enjoy.

Climbing hill has slowed down; very irregular. Evening stretching and exercising has almost come to a stop. As a result I can see myself blooming again. Watching videos at night on YouTube is totally out. Reading books...I still managed this though not as many books as previous years. If I don't do this...I'll go nuts.

Why has the year been so hectic? Blame it on work. It's scary how work and the amount of work just take a big chunk of my life and I end up not having enough time for myself. I am able to sit here tonight to put some thoughts together because I have not been in school for two days....attending course and therefore I am not troubled by work!! Think I should go for courses more often and forget about work.

Some things that had happened this month: somebody tried to break in the house. Thank God we reached home on time to see the person in action. Blur me horned at the car parked right in front of the gate just to realise later it was an attempt to break in.

Made two trips to PD with the kids to destress. It was good. Just driving there and taking time to soak in the sunset and the sea.

Coming up: the most important event of the year....SPM. Lyn will be sitting for it in like two weeks time. Time flies and changes keep happening.

I hope the building in front will be done ASAP. Endured the dust for the whole year now.

5 Theta had a sad year....two students lost their parents...one to cancer and the other to accident.

Good to type these words down.